Monday, July 28, 2008

Party Time!
What this country needs is a good THIRD PARTY. A third party with a candidate who will put some ZEST into this listless presidential campaign. Otherwise, there is a considerable danger of the electorate falling into a stupor, listening to same-old, same-old flip-flopping, mud-slinging, gaffes and retractions, and perhaps forgetting to even go to the polls on November 4. Well,leave it to Madam Z to remedy the situation. Let me introduce you to my choice for Captain of our Ship of State, ZEKE!
(Reprinted from my post in Six Sentences.)

Zeke had been raised as a Republican, but as soon as he was old enough to get a hard-on, he knew that that uptight, sex-fearing, no-partying party was not for him, but he didn’t care much for the Democrats either, since they were all about political correctness and worrying about poor people and boring stuff like that.

So, Zeke decided to start his own political party – the Z-Party; a party that liked to PARTY!

He’d need a new party animal – no lame-ass donkey or fat-ass elephant – the Z-Party’s mascot would be a Zebra, male, of course, and he would be hung like a horse.

Now for the party platform… Zeke scratched his chin and looked up at the sky, smiling, as he pictured himself as President of the new, improved nation.

He had been elected in a landslide, after he told the voters that “Anything goes in the Z-Party, well, almost anything…no murder, of course, and no non-consensual anything, homosexuality is fine, heterosexuality, bestiality, drink whatever you want, smoke whatever you want…hell’s bells, DO whatever you want, as long as you observe the Golden Rule.

Yeah, that’s the only law we need in the Z-party – “Don’t do unto others what you don’t want them to do unto you…or something like that; I’ll work out the details later,” he told the cheering throngs.

He's got my vote!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Rush to Oblivion
I must be getting better, because I'm getting REALLY IRRITATED with right wing hyperbole. I listened to Rush Limbarf for about an hour yesterday, while I was cooking dinner. He is such a bag of noxious gas. All he can do is rant about how dumb and phony and inarticulate and wrong, wrong, wrong Obama is. To prove his case, he had his lackeys piece together a series of "uh... uh... uhs" gleaned from an interview Obama gave. What nerve! After the world being forced to listen to the inane meanderings of Gum Wad Bush for the past 7 years! I have listened to Obama speak in person (at a rally here) and many times on television. He gives every indication of being intelligent, well-educated, calm, honest and is very articulate.
Limbarf said nothing about McCodger, positive or otherwise, just constant negatives about Obama. I listened again today, but could only stomach about 15 minutes of exactly the same diatribe. I remember hearing him about three weeks ago, when he continually slipped in the name "Osama" instead of "Obama." How desperate can the man get? I can only hope that his sycophants will tire of the same rant, day after day, and tune him out.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Being sick has changed my perspective on life. I feel my mortality. My world has contracted. I'm having a hard time being interested in anything outside of my skin. I don't give a damn about politics, global warming, dead penguins, gas prices, burst bubbles, the-utter-stupidity-of-using-corn-to-produce-ethanol, or the mold in my bathtub.
I do have a renewed appreciation for Hubby, though. He has been tender, solicitous and caring through the whole episode. I'm feeling better, just thinking about how fortunate I am.
NEW SUBJECT: The Dark Knight... Have any of you seen it yet? They would have to pay me all the receipts from opening night to make me watch it. Life is grim enough, without being transported into a terrifying, violent, creepy place like Gotham City.
I'd rather laugh than cry. Maybe I could rent an old "Laurel and Hardy" movie...

Monday, July 14, 2008

I know. Long time, no post. That's because I have been in the HOSPITAL since last Tuesday night. Apparently, I provided dinner for a tick infected with Lyme Disease, and it rewarded me with lots and lots of nasty viruses which made me sicker than I've ever been! (Than I can remember, anyway. But every time I get sick, I think it's the worst ever, so who knows.)

Anyway, I'm home now, attempting to get back in the saddle, and will no doubt think of some totally SCINTILLATING material for my next post. But this is the best I can do tonight.

Friday, July 04, 2008

Murder...It's Harder Than You Think!
Utah Savage has invited me to submit, for a magazine she's starting, a story about murdering a man. I jumped on it, thinking "Oh boy, I can get imaginary revenge on at least one of the S.O.B.s who has wronged me." But golly! I'm having a hell of a time actually doing the deed. I can think of, and enjoy fantasizing about torturing them and making them beg for mercy, but I can't get into snuffing them, even fictionally. Geez, I don't even hate Bush and Cheney enough to kill them!
Okay, I'm going to go off and really concentrate on all the reasons at least one of the fuckwads from my shady past deserves to die.