I stare forlornly at the blank page. It dares me to write something on it; it mocks me, whispering..."You have nothing to say, Bitch! Just give it up and go to bed. You know that's what you want to do, so leave me alone in my pristine whiteness. Don't sully my surface with your silly scratchings."
"Hey!" I declare defiantly, "Who do think you are, telling me what to do?"
I attack the page with my sharp pen, scratching out "i's" crossing "t's" and scrawling "f - u's."
Unfortunately, no actual words come out of the assault, but I'm sure kicking that blank page's butt!