Saturday, January 21, 2012

No, this isn't a true story, no matter how much I would like it to be.  It was a challenge issued by the esteemed Mr. Pluck, at

My Computer, My Love 
I have long regarded my computer as my best friend.  It's always there for me when I want it, it does whatever I ask it to do and it never talks back.  It keeps me up to date with the news and safely stores my attempts at writing poetry and short stories.  It helps me correct any spelling errors, but never criticizes the content.  What a pal! 
But lately, I've become aware of a new dimension in our relationship.  Sometimes, when my fingers are pressing against the keys, I can hear a melodious hum and the keys feel warm.  The screen has developed a soft, rosy tint.  And the mouse - oh dear- I know this sounds strange, but really...just now, the mouse has started vibrating ever so gently, in a sensual way. 
Now, I know what you're thinking.  You know that I live alone and haven't been with a man for over a year, so I'm probably pretty darned horny and my imagination is playing tricks on me.   
Well, maybe so, but...wait a minute!  The mouse is really throbbing now and there's a message on the screen!  It says, "We can be more than friends, my dear.  Would you like that?" 
Gosh, I don't know.  Maybe... 
The mouse is bouncing around like crazy!  "Hold me!" the screen commands. 
I wrap my hand around it. 
"Put me in a place that will feel good to both of us!" 
Okay, how about here...OH, OH, OH GOD, OH GOD!  YES!  YES!   
Images of fireworks are dancing across the screen. 
I light a cigarette and exhale slowly.  I am so glad that I upgraded to Windows 69.


Gorilla Bananas said...

Haha, Madam Z! In my next life, I'd like to come back as your computer mouse!


Was that a SCREAM-SAVER or were you just so passionate for good tech-sex?

Wonderful romp as usual Madam Z ... bringing good things to ... uh, life.

~ Your pal,
Absolutely*Kate ... grinnnnin

Madam Z said...

Hey, you big Gorilla! I'll be waiting for you.

Madam Z said...

Hey, Kate! Does it have to be an either/or?

Liam Sweeny said...



Nah Gypzeeeee ~ When given a 'choice' I say go for all the gusto all the time.

Enjoy ... absolutely,
~ Kate

Thomas Pluck said...

Wait until you get a vibrating iPhone! good one, Zelda!

Ray Yanek said...

Wow, looks like we approached this prompt in very similiar ways, although I think your story was a little more...uh, stimulating than mine!

Good stuff!


CMStewart said...

Straight to the point. I bet a few DIYers have made a few mods, as your story describes.

Ingrid Hardy said...

Haha... Windows 69... Could be your tale will be the one predicting the future!

Veronica Marie Lewis-Shaw said...

And I thought I was naughty! Lol!

Wonderful little tale, Madam Z... spare a cigaret, sweetie?

Oh... and... can I borrow your mouse?


Anthony Venutolo said...

Windows 69 ... heh-heh ... ;) Nice one. Double wink.