Wednesday, November 07, 2007


Coffee, Tea or Espresso, Ma'am?


Okay, I'm totally revved up on coffee and am going to post something on here about the joys of caffeine. I used to think I should give up caffeine, because it made my heart "race." Now, after having given up giving up, I have decided that a racing heart is better than no heart at all, which is what I felt like I had when I was dragging my ass around with no chemical enhancement. So now I suck up coffee like I used to do with coke, and while it's not nearly as good, it's the best LEGAL high I can get, so fuck it all, I'll have my tiny high with no regrets, at least until my racing heart crosses the finish line.

8 comments:

Katie Schwartz said...

I am a coffee whore! I share your love. it's the best legal fat free high, isn't it?!

have you perked? buy a percolator, bubbie!

KELSO'S NUTS said...

I gave up coffee and alcohol because I found the illegal highs gave me way less stomach acid and gastritis. I switched to tea (green and black), hot chocolate, soda, water and about everything evil and wrong under the sun except marijuana which I found heavily depressed my dopamine and seratonin levels.

Unlike most people, I don't get those unpleasant nerves from perico. It's merely a mild stimulant which provides some temporary feelings of euphoria but doesn't interfere with my work, my sleep, my life, whatever. A little vitamin C, soya lecithin, fresh citrus fruit and lots of water cleanses the body of it.

I got to give Nancy Reagan and the Partnership-For-A-Drug-Free-America a lot of credit in a sick way. This really is the last American taboo, isn't it? Glad I don't live in America anymore. Admit to having abused a child and they'll book you on Oprah. Admit to enjoying drugs and you're the loneliest man or woman in town.

The way I see it coffee, alcohol, cigarettes, endo, yeyo, vicodin, ecstasy, K, whatever are neither morally good nor morally bad. They are psycho-active agents. That's it.

I give you a lot of credit for even admitting to HAVING used yeyo in the past. Maybe one or two other bloggers I've read ALL over the place have done the same. You can't even joke about it anymore.

Again, just like the issue of Single-Payer National Health or the Abolition Of The Death Penalty are viewed one way inside the United States and the opposite way out of the United States, such it is with "drugs."

Funny thing happened at the pharmacy, though. I picked up a copy of FOREIGN POLICY magazine which is as stuffy and centrist a journal as there is and they seem to take the pro-drug position.

I posted today but am planning another hiatus, except for my usual stuff at THE PITCHFORK. Your bravery in writing openly about drug use makes you my DUDE of the week and therefore this comment will be my last anywhere for a while. Whether that's any kind of honor or not is up to you to decide.

Adios. A demorar un ratito o una vida entera.

Old Knudsen said...

I switched from coke to pepsi and get high on God and prescription pain killers amen.


hasta la flip flop baby.

Madam Z said...

Katie...I KNEW we had something in common besides a complete disregard for convention! Cheers!

Kelso...I'm not crazy over weed, either. Made me paranoid. Now, do me a favor. I can't find my goddamned Spanish dictionary, and I am TORTURED with curiousity. Como se dice "A demorar un ratito o una vida entera" en Ingles? No comprendo demorar, ratito, y entera.

Knudsen... I tried snorting pepsi, but it made me sneeze. Now I get high on a ladder.

KELSO'S NUTS said...

It means "I'll either be back in a sec or sometime by the end of my life."

Madam Z said...

Ah...que profundo! Gracias, mi hermano.

Ms Smack said...

I have to join the coffee whore club but I also suffer, like Kelso for my sins.

A coffee acts like an immediate evacuation for me. Most foods do too, so I'm perpetually empty all the damn time.

LOVE COFFEE but I'm a bit fussy.

I think I'd like to visual me, you and Katie having coffee somewhere on a boardwalk watching the sun go down, while men eat our pussies under the table, eh?

NIIIIIIIIIIIICE VISION!

Madam Z said...

Miss Smack, I LIKE YOUR VISION!! Where can we find a coffee shop like that?