Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Lesson #5 - Don't Go Anywhere Near Anything Calling Itself a "Singles Dance"

Okay, time for a new plan. I saw an ad in the paper for a "Singles Dance" at a place called "The Jukebox," on Friday night. I drove by it first, to check it out. It looked okay. Kind of a bar, restaurant, music place, in a decent neighborhood. Nothing to lose but my pride, I reasoned, so on Friday night I decked myself out in what I hoped was an attractive skirt, blouse and high heels (ugh) and placed myself on the meat market. I sat down at a table in a dimly lighted spot near the dance floor and ordered a Coke. I felt like a 40 year-old, nerdy teenager.

Much to my surprise, a youngish-looking guy came up and asked me to dance, before my Coke even arrived!
It was a slow dance, and he started talking, introducing himself and asking me various questions. "I'm Bob. What's your name?"
"I'm Zelda."
"How old are you?"

I was startled and annoyed by the impertinence of the question, so felt justified in lying. "Thirty-one." He seemed satisfied with that, and pulled me close to him as we continued dancing. Gradually, I became aware that he was leading us into a more brightly lit part of the dance floor. Then, he eased me away from him a bit and looked closely at my face.
"How old are you really?"

No, I didn't say, "Go fuck yourself, asshole!" But I wish I had. Instead, I excused myself, went back to the table to get my jacket, and drove home in a welter of tears.

8 comments:

Dr. Zaius said...

Pay him no mind. What a jerk. There is obviously good reason that the fool is still single.

FranIAm said...

Your words would have been too kind to that idiot asshole.

Fade said...

Hmmm... I'm 35, and I remember that in the "old days" you weren't supposed ask a lady her age, but I seldom remember it in conversation and ask away sometimes. Very rude of him, but maybe he sensed that you had lied to him and thought he was justifed in his rudeness. No, he wasn't.

Sorry he ruined your evening. But there are plenty of people out there who put much more emphasis on a person's personality, intelligence and humor than anything as inconsequential as age. Be content with your age and no one else can use it against you.

fingers said...

See, we'd be OK coz I don't like dancing...

Madam Z said...

Thank you all for your kind comments. But don't worry, this happened several years ago and I'm much older and tougher now.

Distributorcap said...

not only are we sexist and racist -- we are so agist in this country.

i am with you z --- older, wiser and tougher.... and way past 40

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Point that cad out to me and I shall beat him up for you.

Ms Smack said...

How rude! What is age anyways? If you like being with them, what does it matter!

Fucktard.