BAILOUT DEFEAT!

Well, it's all over but the crying. The House listened to the American people for a change, and voted down the bailout plan. The most interesting aspect of this, politically speaking, is that there was bipartisan support AND bipartisan opposition to the proposal.

For the past week, I have been listening to right-wing blowhards claim that the whole sub-prime mess is the fault of political correctness and government pressure on lenders to grant mortgage loans to minorities. In my opinion, that is FUCKING STOOPID! PCness and encouragement to loan to minorities has been around for a long time, but this disaster is the result of reckless greed on the part of realtors, mortgage lenders and brokers, and on up the line. As real estate prices balooned, lending requirements softened, because regular citizens couldn't pay those inflated prices without "help" from the lenders (which consisted of all kinds of complicated finagling which most of the borrowers didn't understand, although they shouldn't have signed the deal if they didn't understand it and I have NO PATIENCE with people who do such stupid things), then the loans were "bundled" and kicked higher up, with someone getting his cut at every step of the way, until the BUBBLE BURST, AS ALL BUBBLES MUST, and everything came crashing down.

Many liberals opposed the bailout because it looks to them like the government would be asking Joe Sixpack to bail out the fat cats who had gambled and lost. "Oh poor babies! They got boo-boos. Let's kiss it and make it well." (I got those words, loosely paraphrased, from one of my favorite liberal bloggers, politits.) Many non-liberals, including many Republicans, agreed with those thoughts and both camps bombarded their representatives with calls and e-mails instructing them to vote a big fat NO on the bailout.

I have a feeling that many people in business and banking were in favor of the bill, because of the possible (probable?) financial mayhem that may (will?) follow. Today's stock market participants sure weren't happy with the defeat (sell, baby, sell). All we can do now is wait and see what happens next.

As for me...

Fingers in Ears, Eyes Closed, La-la-la

Must...keep...mind...off...bailout...

Keep busy, keep busy...work out extra hard at gym (I have 12 1/2 inch biceps. Can any of you ladies top that?) Clean house...nah...rake yard, front and back - YEah! Prune berry bushes...pain from thorns keeps my mind off of... la-la-la... Walk to market, buy 2 lbs of coffee because it's two for the price of one, get home and try to make a pot of coffee, because my energy is flagging, but discover that the coffee is WHOLE BEANS, NOT GROUND! SHIT!!! Try to grind coffee in blender, take lid off to see how it's going, coffee powder spews all over kitchen counter. Make pot of coffee from partially ground coffee beans, drink bitter brew, start cooking dinner, the news comes on the radio...NO, NO, MUST NOT LISTEN! LA-LA-LA! Congress will decide whether to bail out Wall Street to the tune of 700 billion smackers and they have to hurry, because it's time for their vacation! NO, NO, MUST NOT THINK ABOUT IT! Wash dishes, talk to neighbor...she asks what I think about the "stupid-ass bailout." Run! Get back in the house. LA-LA-LA!

Wishy-Washy

When you wish upon a star

It won't get you very far.

So give it up already!

Oh no! I can't! Wishing comes naturally to me. It's the only thing I do effortlessly, without having to force myself. I am tireless, creative and ambitious in my wishing. I can do it while I'm washing dishes (I wish I had a dishwasher, preferably a handsome muscley, naked male dishwasher), driving to the market (I wish my groceries would be delivered straight to my kitchen, preferably by a handsome, muscley naked man), working out at the gym (I wish I still belonged to that gym which was frequented by muscley, partially naked men), hiking in the woods (I wish I would come upon Pan, leaning back against a tree, playing his pipes), and while dreaming (I wish I could have sexy dreams without feeling guilty).

Oh yes! I will! It's a waste of time. It's a distraction from constructive thoughts and actions. Wishing will NOT make it so. Not even if you get the big piece of the wishbone,

not even if you blow out all the candles on your birthday cake in one breath,

not even if you promise god you'll be good foreverafter, if he just grants

that one wish, not even if you find a magic lamp and rub it just right.

Your wishes will not be fulfilled unless you take that genie by the horns and make it happen all by yourself.

So...how will I do it? Let's take one wish at a time.

1. I wish I were pretty.

Get plastic surgery!

2. I wish I were rich.

Redefine "rich."

3. I wish there were peace on earth.

Hm. Next!

4. I wish someone would dust all my shelves full of bric-a-brac.

Grab a goddamn dustcloth and get busy!!!

5. I wish I could get some of my short stories published.

Good grief! Pull one of those "writers' market" books off the bookshelf, find an address, type a goddamn cover letter, enclose your goddamn story, address an envelope, apply a stamp and stick it in the mailbox! Sheesh!

6. I wish I weren't afraid of failure.

Pretend you're afraid of success, instead.

7. I wish I could stop wishing.

I give up. You're hopeless.

That Goddamned Lipstick!

Okay, it was a cute joke the first time Palin uttered the now tired joke, "What's the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick!" But now, the horrifying follow-up to that joke may bring down the Obama campaign, if enough people get caught up in the firestorm that the right-wing talk show idiots are trying to stoke.

Do you know what I'm referring to? Recently, Obama was speaking to a gathering of his fans, and said that McCain, in spite of claiming to be a reformer, was actually not much different from Bush. Then he dropped this little bomb: "You can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig." Now I am pretty darned sure that he was just making his own little joke, by trotting out the word "lipstick" in the context of an old adage. He was referring to McCain and his policies.

But now the right-wingnut talk show hosts have started a relentless tirade, claiming that Obama was CALLING SARAH PALIN A PIG! That preposterous claim is gathering steam like the proverbial runaway freight train. How can they and the people who listen to them possibly believe something so improbable? Actually, I don't think Limbaugh-Hannity-Savage really believe it, but they know their listeners will. Have they no shame? It just goes to show that you can put lipstick on a wingnut, but he's still a wingnut. Make that a "fucking idiot wingnut asshole." Grrrrrr!

Ignorance is a Sin and I Have Sinned!

I confess. I was swayed by Sarah Palin's style and confidence. I thought I could see some cracks forming in the glass ceiling. But now, after reading countless exposes on various liberal blogs, I have become educated about her inadequacies. Now I can go back to knowing that I will not see a woman in the oval office in my lifetime. There are countless women who are qualified to be President of the U.S. But they would be savaged by the opposition for reasons that no man would be subjected to. Look what Hillary Clinton went through.

I'll vote for Obama, because I think he'll make a better President than would McCain. And who knows? Maybe someday one of his daughters might be nominated for the highest or second-highest office in the land. If so, I hope she'll have more experience in governing than any human being on the planet, an absolutely spotless past and present, and nerves of steel.

Several More Words for the Democrats

Get Obama to dump Boring Biden and find a beautiful, fiery, articulate WOMAN with some EXECUTIVE experience, even if it's only as President of a goddamn HOCKEY CLUB!

And if that won't fly, at least find a speaker as entertaining as Rudy Guilliani to address some rallies. Otherwise, Obama's campaign is going to sink like a stone. A heavy, grey, self-righteous, bloviating stone.